The Goulding Method

Official Goulding Consultants & Trainers Site

A simple, safe method for parents helping children establish emotional intelligence, loving attachment and acceptance.

Speech, Eating & Sleeping Issues

“Obsessive behaviour issues displayed by ‘L’ about keeping things in order was compelled by hoarding lots of random items.

He does not like his items to be touched or moved, tends to escalate on his anger quickly, clenches his fist and face and he goes red from frustration.

When he gets upset, he cries and begins to hyperventilate. As a form of additional control, he also makes sure he eats everything that is given to him – as a reaction to “not having” or “attention”. 

Mum found the process difficult to start initially, as trying to form the habit at night was a bit of a challenge after a long day.

However, after 2 weeks she had the hang of it and was thoroughly enjoying it. She was encouraged to keep going and kept in regular contact. Significant shifts were noted with ‘L’ anxious behaviour.

Feedback included that he was not collecting as many items, he was being more open to change, willingness to throw random items away (junk),  he also was not crying so hard that previously would have caused him to hyperventilate. Other areas mentioned were a willingness to learn new skills, being ok to start interacting with other kids by using his own initiative and finally being more content to continue doing his own thing. 

There was a 50% improvement so we moved to Phase 2. To ensure that ‘L’ continued to remain calm and secure, we introduced additional suggestions to help build confidence. The biggest behaviour change that was noticed was the obsessive behaviour.

The decrease in his need to hoard items and collect items as well as allowing them to be touched and moved, was a significant and worthwhile improvement.

‘L’ has succeeded quite substantially by improving on some quite escalated behaviour in only 24 weeks of doing the programme. Having decreased his need for control on items through his anxiety which is allowing him to interact more with children and hoard much less.” 

Accredited Consultant – Tarryn Pickup – Sth Africa 

 

Meal Times are Calmer 

“Mum reports that ‘E’ is giving more kisses and cuddles and is generally much more affectionate. She will continue with the Foundation script for the time being and we will consider adding a supporting statement if and when it is deemed to be necessary.

I saw mum again in August. ‘E’ has continued to progress in most areas. She is still a little anxious at times and mum still has concerns about her eating. Meal times are calmer but mum is still worried about ‘E’s weight. 

(She looks fine to me. I think perhaps mum is worrying unnecessarily. Mum has been doing  The Goulding Method – SleepTalk consistently and I felt it was a good time to introduce a support statement to address anxiety and self-esteem issues she still has. 

I spoke to mum in September. She is more than hoppy with  the process. She feels that ‘E’ is less anxious, calmer and that her self-esteem has improved. She will continue with SleepTalk and will talk to her again soon for update.

Kathryn Duncan – Qld 2014

 

Needs to eat

“Initially the main reason ‘H’ parents became interested in the Goulding  Process- SleepTalk® was with the hope that it would help them to get her to eat. Because of the nature of the disease and the body’s inability to break down and absorb food every meal has to be eaten along with enzymes so that the body can benefit from the food. 

This in itself presents a large conflict. The parents understand that they must get their child to eat and so over the course of several years mealtimes have become difficult for all involved. ‘H’ who lacks any control over the situation is desperately seeking control and the parents – mom especially – feel they have no choice but to be in control – allowing her not to eat is simply not an option for them.

The Goulding Method- SleepTalk® has helped in many ways, the parents feel like they are actually doing something constructive. They have found ways to give ‘H’ control in her life so that she is not so insistent on controlling the one thing that has become so difficult for all involved.

The feedback from the parents has been that they have noticed that she is happier and generally more easy going. The parents have also realized their responsibility to do something about the way they are dealing with the fact that they have a daughter with CF.

 A lot of the problems in the home are as a result of the unfairness and anger that mom is experiencing all the time. Our next step is to address specific areas where we can help the child’s overall health and wellbeing.

 Update: After a few months of using The Goulding Method – SleepTalk® unfortunately the parents have not kept up the practice. One of the things that this particular case has taught me is just how profound an impact the Goulding Method – SleepTalk® has on the family unit. 

Even outside of the actual process of giving suggestions to the subconscious mind of the child. The overall awareness in the family of the words we use and the actions of the parents has just as much to do with the success of The Goulding Method- SleepTalk®. 

That added to the empowerment that the parents feel that they are actually doing something to give their child such a gift, all works together to make The Goulding Method- SleepTalk® what it is – nothing less than miraculous.

Consultant: Philip Donegan – Ireland 2009

 

Going very well .

The kids are going very well and are happy.   ‘O’ is eating and sleeping well and ‘H’s talking is much clearer – has come a long way.

Overall I can see that they are confident and happy little people who given we have just moved house and they have new school/kindergartens, they have settled in without any issues or concerns.  In fact they are very excited each day to be going.

At this stage I feel confident that the kids are going well and that a follow up consultation is not necessary.  I will continue to monitor them and at any stage require additional help beyond your very detailed and helpful book I will give you a call.

Thank you for all your help.  SleepTalk® Mum 2009

 

Feedback received:  “A little girl of 4 years was very advanced for her young age. ‘A’ often says she does not like mom and does not like dad. There is a fraternal rivalry with her sister and has ‘A’ has trouble falling asleep.

At the end of the 1st Phase: ‘A’ has become incredibly calm. The parents had a 10 day break  and ‘A’ lived with her grandparents for the holiday. On her return she started to show anger again especially towards her sister, so the parents re- started the process and found again a clear improvement. She still has some problems falling asleep but is improving. 

The suggestions chosen or the 2nd Phase are definitely helping and the parents are amazed by the changes. ‘A’ is continuing to be calm and the parents are more than willing to continue the process.

Accredited Consultant: Rose-Marie Mauron – Genève